We won't sleep together?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
