I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
