he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize