i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
