Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
It's never too late to be topless.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
