I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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