why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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