toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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