Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
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