***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
