hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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