apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
