You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I'm bleeding and have questions
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
