I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
