i don't like sucking hair
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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