and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
