Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i am craving dick and cupcakes
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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