And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
