Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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