Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
