id be glad to
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize