Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
