Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
