I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
