Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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