i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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