I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
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