Dual....:-)
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I just forgot I was standing up.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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