hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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