yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
