just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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