i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
