Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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