Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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