Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
