apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
