Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Randomize
