I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
