Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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