i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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