Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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