I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
