its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
