Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Just high enough for therapy.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
