why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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