Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
either way he was missing a nipple.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
