she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
