When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
