Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Randomize
