I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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